On what it means to really “like” something and the types of “likes” or liking.
So, you log in to your Facebook or other social media profile and see something. Within seconds you give a “like”. So what is the meaning of these “likes”, the billions of likes that social media seem to have collected? Liking something on social media or the virtual world is primarily different from liking something offline or in a real world. You like something on social media, primarily to share the idea or comment with friends. Liking something in the real world may not have this immediate social connotation because you may go shopping and like a handbag and there is no one else to share it with, so you just buy it to show it to others. In some cases, you may like things but may not buy or like a place that you want to visit in the future. So how do we analyze “liking”?
Liking and likes can be divided into several categories including social like. possessive like, aesthetic like, familiarity like, novelty like and agreement like.
Social Liking – This is primarily based on your social needs to share something and may overlap with agreement liking or possessive liking. But in this case, the genuine motivation to like something is triggered by the need to share it with friends and relatives. So the likes you click on social media is a social like and you appreciate something because you want to share your opinions, agreement or appreciation for something with others. Social liking can also be a real world experience when you go shopping or dining and share your likes and choices with friends or people with you or online. There is an underlying social need that motivates this type of liking. There may be a group feeling and you may like something that other people in your group or social circle also like it.
Possessive Liking – Liking something can create possessiveness about that thing and you may like something and want to possess it. Buying a handbag or a shoe or even trying to date someone because you like him or her is determined by this kind of possessiveness. You feel possessive about a man or a woman and you want to date him or her or even marry. You see a shoe. a bag or a house and you want to possess this object because you cannot let go of your liking for this thing. Our impulsive shopping sprees are often determined by this sort of possessive liking. There is also a tinge of social need involved as you may buy or possess something to show off to your friends. You date a handsome man to make your friends jealous. Although finally possessiveness is primarily marked by personal needs and the need to possess something may have many psychological reasons. So, possessive liking is also more psychologically complex than the other types of liking.
Aesthetic Liking – This is liking based on your sense of beauty, choice, preference. Every individual has their sense of what is beautiful and something or someone immensely attractive or beautiful to one person, may not be beautiful to someone else. Aesthetic Liking is when you can appreciate something or someone’s beauty without the need to possess. So, when you can genuinely appreciate a piece of art or clothing or furniture and like it Your aesthetic liking may vary widely from other people’s sense of beauty so aesthetic liking is very personal, although of course a piece of art may be appreciated by several people at the same time, so there is a sense of “collective aesthetic liking” that human beings share.
Familiar Liking – This type of liking is associated with nostalgia, Deja vu and similar phenomena. You may like someone because there is a sense of familiarity and they remind you of someone else. Familiarity creates a bond and attachment and liking is associated with attachment. When a house looks familiar, you will be eager to rent or buy it, when a person looks familiar, you will be eager to become her friend. When a place looks familiar, you want to spend more time there. Familiarity creates instant liking although the liking may be fleeting or temporary at times. That is because some people may feel quickly bored with familiarity and need novelty or unique experiences.
Novelty Liking – At the opposite end of the spectrum of familiarity is novelty. You like something instantly because it is different, unique or novel in some way. You see a very unique design, it may not appeal to your sense of aesthetics but it fascinates you and you believe that you like it.Sometimes a scientific experiment may give you by products that you immediately like, although it may be a completely unexpected outcome. So novelty creates curiosity, fascination and you may ultimately like it because of its uniqueness.
Agreement Liking – Finally we come to agreement liking and individuals usually like something or someone they agree with. You may agree with a comment or an article completely or feel that the sentiments expressed are something you can relate to, then you will genuinely like what is being said or written. You may agree with the policies of a political candidate and decide to vote for him, because you like him.Agreement liking is actually a more stable form of liking because when you agree with someone on basic points, it creates a kind of stability in your liking for this person. People’s opinions and basic views in life tend to remain unchanged so agreement with another person’s views or opinions would be a stable supportive liking. When you like a group or its cause and decide to join the cause, that is agreement liking.
Let me add some concluding words here. Liking is quite different from say, attraction. You may find a person physically attractive, but you may find it difficult to genuinely like that person because despite the attraction, they may not suit your sense of aesthetics or they may lack novelty or familiarity and so on. So, liking and attraction are not the same thing. You may like a person very much, but you may not feel attracted to them physically, romantically or emotionally. You may like many people professionally and like your colleagues and people you work with, but you are not attracted to your colleagues. Of course, there are sometimes blurred lines in human relationships but generally there are distinct and different psychological dynamic for like, love, attraction and so on.
Source by Saberi Roy
